High Performance Leadership

Are some life lessons harder on you than others? The hardest of course are those that damage you -- falling victim and learning not to be a victim, getting dominated and either building strength or embracing servitude -- lessons that we don't necessarily choose because they choose us. A lesson that chose me was this: people seldom keep their promises. Even the people I have felt the closest to have broken promises. Even people who swore on legal oaths (and yes, even on a Bible) have broken promises. And, of course, I have broken promises. Hard lessons all.  Why do we break our promises? Because they are so very hard to keep. They bind us. They restrict us. They surrender us to the word and well-being of another or others and as a result it feels as if our own freedom diminishes. We just aren't wired to give that stuff up easily. But we sure do promise it easily. People make promises they have no earthly chance of keeping and often no conscious intention of keeping. That's a...

Do you keep your promises? I do my best, and yet I know I've broken some serious promises. We can learn from broken promises but it's easier to learn than it is to heal. A broken promise is a lie proven. A broken promise is a heart stomped on and painted over brown. A broken promise hurts. High performance leaders keep their promises. I've learned that could mean to make fewer promises AND to keep track of them. Ask someone to hold you accountable. Write it down. Believe it. Making any promise lightly comes back a heavy load. The hurt of broken words exceeds whatever convenience felt worthy at the time. Here are some promises leaders make: Of course I've got your back You'll get all the training you need We live by our values every day at this company I promise to review your work and make it worth your while Your place is secure here... You get the idea. Promises that leaders make are promises that they should not break. The thing about pro...

How do you feel about broken promises? I hate them. They break my heart. They tear me up. And yet, I've broken lots of promises of my own. It feels different when someone else breaks a promise. They've made a terrible mistake. And yet when it's me who has broken the promise I can easily find a rationalization or a reason or even put blinders on so that I don't see the broken promise. Some days we all have blinders on. Some things we can't see because they're too close. Then, what does a promise mean? Is it really so transitory? Is it really just the hope of a promise and not really a promise? When we make a promise, how long are we obligated to keep it? A promise is a promise. To break it requires a new agreement. If both people do not reach that new agreement, a broken promise is an infraction, a harm. I'm learning oh so well to be very careful about promises. Careful about what I promise, and careful about what I accept from others as a promi...