Who's Misunderstood?

When someone is disappointing you they may have misunderstood your intentions. (Or, maybe you have...)

The challenge to misunderstanding is that we seldom understand that we have understood. The illusion of truth is as strong as steel.

Disappointment, originating in unmet expectations, requires clarity to be cured. Clarify your intentions. Clarify your expectations. Clarify, and confirm.

What do you think?

-- doug smith

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The Problem With Compromises

Think about the last time you compromised on something. Whether it was a big compromise or a little compromise, how do you feel about it now? While we often call it "meet in the middle" it seldom does. Compromises are not automatically fair, no matter how implied that fairness is. Someone usually gets more out of a compromise than the person they are "compromising" with. If the low end is you, you don't like it -- and you remember that. If the top end of the compromise is you, you probably forget all about it even though the inequity simmers in the background. Compromises must be constantly revisited because they are inevitably unfair. If you get the chance to balance things out, your relationship will prosper. If you miss that chance, the relationship will suffer. What's your choice? -- doug smith

What You Need

Use what you've learned to become what you need. -- doug smith

Show Up!

"You've got to be there. Big decisions are being made!" my former boss told me a long time ago. "If your voice is in the room you might be heard..." It was good advice then and it still is. Show up. When there's a goal you're working on and an opportunity appears to advance that goal -- show up. When changes are being made that will affect you -- show up! When it matters to you -- show up. You won't always get what you want by showing up, but you never will if you don't! -- doug smith

Not Too Many Goals

How many goals should you have? Is there a limit? I've known people who said that they had a hundred goals. They were working their way thru the list and checking them off one by one. Good for them. I could never do that. It's too many. How do you even keep that many straight? How do you build energy for them? Some people call a list like that a bucket-list. If that's what it is, it isn't so much a list of goals as plans for experience. That's very different. Goals require work. Goals require attention. Goals require a level of focus seldom afforded anything else. The discipline that takes limits the capacity anyone has for setting goals. We can only do so much. Of course, we aspire to do more. Of course we put lots of stretch into our goals and our list of goals. But, we can only do so many. I can't tell you what that number is. I find that 5 goals a day is a good number for me. Five achievable goals for each day and another 3 - 5 major goals that ca...

Nobody Is Interested In Excuses

Imagine this - you've been expecting someone on your team to complete an important task. The deadline is looming. You're ready for the deliverable at any time, and then...and then they start the list of excuses why they can't complete the task. No fun, right? Not acceptable, true? True for you, and true for others who rely on you as well. Leading for success leaves little room for excuses. When I worked at Whole Foods one of my bosses once said, "we live in the land of no excuses." It was true there then, and it's true here now. Nobody is interested in any excuses. -- Doug Smith

Growing

Mountains never stop growing; why should we? It came as a surprise to me to learn that the Rocky Mountains are still growing. Trimmed a bit by years of erosion, they are still poking their way skyward and changing in the direction of growth. As leaders we find ourselves faced with the dynamic between growth and erosion, life and decay. Standing still leads to the less desirable choice. Growth requires our attention, our efforts, our drive. Growth requires the courage to step forward, the creativity to find new ways of dealing with challenges, the clarity of purpose to know which direction you are growing in and the compassion to forgive those who slow you down. What are you doing to spark your leadership growth today? -- Douglas Brent Smith

Move from "Me" to "We"

by David Spiegel "The secret to success is to know something nobody else does." -- Aristotle Here is another guest entry from my friend, David Spiegel. I especially like how he ties this together with one of John Maxwell's Words of The Day. As you read this, think about how you can move in the direction of turning what you do best from a "me" effort to a "we" movement. A s I was stretching this morning waiting for my trainer to finish up with his 7:30 clients, I had the opportunity to look around the gym. When I started working with Cris, the head trainer,he had appointments set pretty much back to back for himself. There was another trainer who I saw occasionally. Today, there was Cris working with "the Killer Couple" (these two really work hard!). There were also 3 or 4 other trainers working with clients. Some individuals and some working with two clients at the same time.There was a buzz of activity as these tr...

The Benefits of Supervisory Training

When was the last time you had any leadership training? How often do the supervisors in your organization get training? If you are like most organizations, it's never enough. Some teams go without any supervisory training at all and expect supervisors and managers to learn as they go, on the job. Unfortunately, while it is memorable to learn from your mistakes, it comes at a high cost. People get tired. People leave. Important accounts go away. Customers complain. And teams struggle without the skills and knowledge it takes to build cohesive teams that are capable of solving problems, improving performance and achieving goals. Admittedly, I can be expected to support training since I'm in the business. Still, take a closer look at your own leadership career and decide for yourself. Are leaders better off with more training and development or with less? Supervisory training can generate benefits that pay off long after the training is over. Here are just a few of the things sup...

Does Punishment Work to Motivate People?

Do you believe that people only respond to two basic motivations, punishment and reward? If that's the case, then punishment should be an effective motivator, right? People will do whatever they have to do to avoid punishment, right? Maybe. Fear certainly does effect behavior. A strong leader may create an atmosphere where people will do what they are expected to do to avoid punishment. Fear may prod some people into towing the line. They will do what they are told to do. But, they will likely do no more. Fear creates a lowest common denominator mentality. Of course we do not want to be punished so of course we will do whatever it takes to avoid that punishment. Sometimes, whatever it takes creates side-effects that leaders don't want, don't count on, and don't deal with effectively. It can spiral into an non-virtuous cycle of failure. No leader really wants that. Here's one of the biggest problems with leading by punishing: P eople find ways to get even with those ...

Forget What You Know?

Does it ever make sense to forget what you know? What if what you know is certain and true? What if you simply believe it to be true, but beyond your knowledge it isn't true at all? Sometimes learning requires the suspension of what we think is true. We need to be able to entertain a contradiction or paradox long enough to find a new perspective. Maybe we will change our mind, maybe we won't, but we give it air time. We let it breathe. We expand our world of possibilities just long enough to see if we're missing something important. Creatives are constantly willing to forget what they think they know to learn something far more useful. Something far more magical. Something far more brilliant. And, possibly something far more true. Sometimes it happens. Sometimes it does not and we are free to hold to what we already believe. But without trying, without the willingness to suspend judgement for long enough to see anew -- how will we ever know? -- Douglas Brent...

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