When Assertive Courage Is Your Choice

Do you ever work with people who seem to be intentionally difficult to work with?

No matter what you say, no matter how curious you stay, no matter how compassionately you approach them they persist in doing contrary things, passive aggressive actions, and outright interference?

Maybe it's not the time for compassion. Maybe the time of understanding and empathy is over.

When people are intentionally hard to work with they need to see your assertive courage more than your compassion.

A bully will keep on pushing until the pushing is stopped. An intentionally difficult person needs to see and experience your boundaries and the consequences of breaking those boundaries.

How do you know when they are being intentionally difficult? Ask. If their words don't tell you, their body language probably will. Put them on notice that you see the boundaries being broken and that it's not acceptable.

Because in the end, intentional or not, strong supervisors -- even compassionate and centered supervisors -- sometimes must enforce the boundaries for the good of the team.

-- Douglas Brent Smith

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