How I Avoided Becoming a Wuss

How I Avoided Becoming a Wuss - By David Spiegel

"The privilege of a lifetime is being who you are."

Joseph Campbell

Responding to my email from yesterday, I heard from a dear friend. She commented "Loved this thought for the day!".

It made me smile.

It also gave me pause to remember how and when she and I first met. We were freshmen together entering college, away from the comfort and safety of our parents homes. We had the same major at the time, music.

It was during those early days of being on my own, that I chose to pledge a fraternity. I truly believe this experience was a significant part of me becoming the person I am and not the wuss that I could have been.

This was not what anyone would consider the party animal or jock mentality frat that you often see portrayed in movies. It was however a place where the notion that you stand up to a challenge, rather than run away from one became part of who I am.

It would have been easy to spend my college days anonymously,getting by and following a path that some "adult" laid out for me. Instead I chose not only the road less taken, I often chose the road that had not been ventured down at all. The fraternity and the young men who would become my brothers, played a big role in that Journey.

I have played and coached in a lot of sports over the years. In wrestling, I learned to put on my headgear, walk confidently to the middle of the mat, shake hands firmly with my opponent, looking him straight in the eye, acknowledge the ref and then have at it.

It didn't matter that with in seconds I often ended up flat on my back staring at the ceiling.

It didn't matter to me that my opponent had been the district champ a year earlier.

It didn't matter that he was undefeated and had just been named athlete of the week.

Look him straight in the eye, shake his hand and wait for the whistle.

What did matter was that no matter how often (and believe me it was quite often) I ended up staring at that ceiling, when it was over I popped back up, walked upright to the middle of the mat and shook hands with my foe once again looking him straight in the eye.

It's called character.

The frat experience, hazing and all, solidified that character building. Life is not always easy.

Soft is no way to go through life. You get bumped and bruised along the way. You shake it off, you dust yourself off and then you get back in the game, the game of life. All the while standing tall and looking at whatever is in front of you squarely in the eye.

That's a big part of this game of life.

When I think of how I want to show up for that game, I am reminded of my first football coach saying "gentlemen, when it's game day, it's time to pull up your jockstrap, stick you hand in the dirt and have at it!"

Building character.

That's how you avoid becoming a wuss.

-- David Spiegel

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