Build Your Character With Your Goals

What makes us who we are?

If that sounds like a question for a twelve week course to you, you're probably right. What makes us who we are is complicated.

Sometimes forgotten in the mix of genes, education, parenting, and peer adaptation is our approach to goals. Do we set goals, how do we set them, what kinds of goals do we set, how assertive are we about working on them? All kinds of questions centering on our approach to goals.

It's easy to forget, but ever so important.

How we achieve our goals determines who we become.

Where ever we started, however we got to the present, regardless of our previous circumstance -- we control our approach to goals today.

What's your approach?

How are you doing at your goals?

Where are your opportunities to create an even greater you?

-- Douglas Brent Smith

Comments

Should You Judge Ideas?

How did your last brainstorming session go? Having been thru tons of brainstorming sessions, I know that they don't always go well. Sometimes people judge ideas too soon. Sometimes people don't give themselves enough time to develop the best and most creative ideas. Sometimes, people settle for stupid ideas. Yes, we do need to generate lots of ideas. Yes, we do judge too much without letting our imaginations go wild. But, there does come a time when reason must rule. There does come a time when we must fall out of love with our ideas enough to see them for what they really are. Because, as a matter of fact, there IS such a thing as a stupid idea. And you wouldn't want to run with that, would you? -- Doug Smith

Learn Constantly No Matter How Annoying It Is

Some things that annoy us the most grow us the most. I never asked for some of my biggest lessons. I probably didn't ask for any of them. They hurt. They bruised. They provoked anxiety. They made me sweat. But I learned. I learned that people need lots of attention. That sending an email isn't enough. That a handshake (and even a kiss) doesn't mean that a deal won't ever be broken. That broken promises (especially when a kiss IS involved) are the hardest lessons to take. We go on. We strive forward. We learn. We forgive. I am annoyed by big lessons. My ex-wife once gave me a little present that was a miniature traffic cone with the words "Oh no, not another learning opportunity!" on it. That about sums it up: not right now please, I'd rather not get that lesson. We don't always get to pick the timing, but we do get to decide whether or not we learn from those things that annoy us. Things like the team member who isn't finishing the import...

Roll With Your Creativity

You have a secret healing power. Sometimes you use it without even knowing it. If you're like me, you could use it even more. It's a power that heals each person and when we heal ourselves we are much better positioned to heal and help others. Creativity energy heals. Bring that creative energy out. Encourage your creativity. Avoid shutting it down when it inconveniently offers to embarrass you with a really wild idea. Roll with it way more often. When you've gotten to the point where people ask you what's gotten into you because you seem a little more wild and spontaneous than usual -- that's when you know you're on the right track. You're headed in a creative direction that will burst open the veil of constraints you think you see but is only a mirage. It's all available. The possibilities are endless. Creativity rocks. Might as well roll with it. -- Doug Smith

Mistakes Don't Care

I can't erase my mistakes, how about you? I've learned that mistakes don't care how we feel about them. We do have a choice, though. That is the choice of whether or not we learn from those mistakes. It helps to talk about them. It helps to analyze what went wrong. Eventually, though, we must move on. We live with our mistakes, whether we want to or not. Why not get over it, and move on? -- Doug Smith

Leading Relationships

While looking for something else, l found this quote: "Appreciate you without judging. Join you without invading, Invite you without demanding. Leave you without guilt." -- Virginia Satir It reminded me that part of a leader's role is in leading relationships. That's not the same as directing or controlling them. Leading relationships has more to do with taking personal responsibility for what you bring to a relationship -- whether that's at work, in the community, at home...anywhere. Relationships can not be taken for granted. To truly lead, we must remain attentive to the kinds of relationships we are co-creating. Appreciate you without judging We don't always have the answer, but we usually think that we do. Effective leaders listen with their whole being. We bring our soul to the game. We wait to be touched before reaching out to correct. We appreciate and allow for differences. Courageous leaders correct dangerous situations, but hold ...

Step Up Creatively

How's your creativity doing today? We all have days that are more creative than others. If we're not careful and if we let the non-creative days become routine it can squeeze the creativity right out of our lives. Suddenly we stop drawing, stop paining, stop writing, stop exploring fun conversations, stop doing the extraordinary. Let's not let that happen. We're more creative than that. Sometimes when we feel the least creative we need to be the most creative. Overcome the routine. Break out of the rut. Draw anything. Draw it again, better. Write a poem about anything - then write it again with a deeper meaning. Force yourself out of the mundane. Imagine yourself in a room with five of the most people you can think of. You wouldn't want to be the lump on the log who sits there doing nothing creative, would you? You need never be that person. Creativity is always there for the developing. We just need to disconnect from the routine and reconnect to that chi...

Compassion Does Not Require You To Be A Victim

Is it possible to be too compassionate? I suppose that it depends on what you mean by compassionate. Certainly, we owe it to other living beings (and I include all living beings in that, not just people) kindness, grace, caring, and working to create tolerable or better living conditions. We are fundamentally here to help others. But that does not mean that we need do anything anyone asks. We need not become a victim. Some people are in need beyond our capacity to provide that need. Some people take advantage of our desire to help. Some people (gasp!) simply can't be trusted. I come from a tradition of faith that says help anyway, and I believe that is best. Help anyway. Do what we can. But...and maybe I'm going out on a limb here...but not to the point of becoming a victim. Sometimes we must say no. Sometimes we must walk away. Compassion does not require foolishness. We are not required to surrender our selves when evil prevails. Please do not misunderstand me. I ...

Encourage Your Creativity

Do you find time each day to be creative, to do something creative? It doesn't need to be a big deal. Maybe you aren't going to finish that novel today or wrap up that film. But you can still be creative. Your day, your life can be filled with creative things. Try something new. Take a different way home from work. Read a magazine you've never read before. Draw, and then frame that doodle. Cook a new dish ...we can always find new ways to exercise our creativity. It sparks new ideas and helps us refine old ones. Your brain likes creativity. Why not make sure it gets the creativity it craves today? -- Doug Smith

Work That Plan!

"Constant and determined effort breaks down all resistance and sweeps away all obstacles." -- Claude M. Bristol I enjoy designing a plan to achieve a goal. Listing the tasks, estimating the times, scheduling them - that all appeals to my analytical side. Then comes the hard part: getting it done. But it's not really hard. It's one step at a time. One movement, one action, one call, one thing . At - a - time. Design a cool, appealing plan. And then, most importantly, act relentlessly on your plan. As Larry the Cable Guy says, "get -er done!" -- Doug Smith

Insist On The Truth

How many lies are acceptable to you? Centered leaders confront all lies as soon as possible. Clarify, validate, ask. A lie left alone only grows worse. The truth may seem flexible but require constant diligence. How else will you know what is true? -- Douglas Brent Smith

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