Centered Leaders Control Their Inner Judge

When was the last time you judged someone or something?

For many of us the answer is minutes ago, maybe even seconds ago. We're good, and well practiced at judging.

The problem is we judge too much. We judge when people aren't expecting it. We judge when people don't need it. We judge when it doesn't do us any good.

We could all judge a lot less.

We can keep a sensible manner about us without all of that evaluation. We can learn to accept some things and some people for what and who they are. Especially when they have not asked us to help them change.

We should be careful about becoming a self-appointed judge.

If no one elected us to that position, chances are they won't care about our judgments anyway. And without the pretense, we could be much more free to enjoy people the way they are.

Successful supervisors, centered leaders, and high performance leaders use judging sparingly.

-- Douglas Brent Smith

Comments

A Promise or A Plan?

Which would you rather have -- a promise, or a plan? I love promises. When some people make a promise to me I know that it is as good as done. They are reliable, trustworthy, hard-working creative people who keep their promises. I'll take a promise from them any day. Promises can be problematic sometimes, though. Some people are not so skilled or willing to keep their promises. They may make a promise to move forward in the conversation (possibly because the conversation is deep enough to cause some discomfort) and yet have no intention of keeping that promise. That's not helpful. That's not what centered leaders are looking for. That's not how centered problem solvers operate. Promises are great and I'm also interested in the plan. What exactly are they promising to do and when will they do it? What's the plan? Picking a promise over a plan is a risky way to solve a problem. Problems respond better to the actions completed in a careful and thorough...

High Performance Leaders Combine Courage and Compassion

What do people look for in a leader? I believe that there are four key strengths that leaders must develop: clarity, courage, creativity, and compassion. As leaders we should develop these in connection with each other. I was thinking about this as I was leading a workshop on controlling chaos yesterday. When we are leading our way (and others' way) through difficult situations it is no time to be shy. It's not the time to sit back and wait for something to happen. It's not the time to get passive. High performance leaders make their expectations clear. They raise the bar. They look for people to give their best, speak up, and be assertive. It's easy to go over the edge, though. It's easy to fall into an extreme. Leaders do it frequently and are often portrayed in the media as strong and confident even though that occurs at the expense of other people's self-esteem and well being. Centered, high performance leaders do not lead and achieve at the expense ...

More On Learning

Even brilliant minds sometimes fall behind. Keep learning. I say it a lot, and yet can't say it enough: keep learning. That's a note to self as well as anyone else. What have you learned today? -- doug smith

Lead By Example

People do want to be challenged, but only by people who walk the talk. Leaders who demonstrate the character and discipline that they demand from others. What would your team look like if everyone on your team performed exactly like you? -- doug smith

Focus First

Ambition without vision consumes everything around it. -- doug smith

Nothing Left to Give?

Saying that we did the best we ould and actually DOING the best we could are NOT the same and does not fool anyone. You'll know for sure when you did the best you could when there is nothing left to give. -- doug smith

One Generation Behind

It's not fair. It's not exactly logical. But how true do you think it is? Every generation creates its own problems -- and must solve the problems of the previous generation. Maybe it's the advance of technology. Maybe it's the quality of thinking. Maybe it's the incubator of time. What do you think? -- Douglas Brent Smith

Monologue

When it sounds like I'm preaching I'm primarily talking to myself. -- doug smith

Perception Frames Your Problem

How do you know for sure if something is a problem? If you see it as a problem, then it is a problem. Your perception will tell you -- not reality, but what you consider important about your reality. If you see it as a problem, shouldn't you do something about it? Centered problem solving sorts through our perceptions and checks in with the perceptions of other people who are effected by the situation. Emotions can trigger misconceptions, so centering ourselves and testing our assumptions is key. Then, if it's still a problem, it's time to do something about it. -- Douglas Brent Smith Bring our Centered Problem Solving workshop to your location and dramatically increase the problem solving skills of the people who attend.

High Performance Leaders and Emotions

Are you an emotional leader? I had a boss once who put his fist thru a wall. He got lucky. If he hits a stud, it's a broken hand, at least. But he hit pure dry wall and his fist went right thru. He was making a point. I don't remember what his point was, but it was obvious that he was angry. He was also out of control. Leaders can't afford to look out of control. Scare your team and they'll lose productivity faster than you can say "update the resume." I've lost my temper, too -- but never put my fist thru a wall (at work. I did once in college in the apartment where I lived, but that's another story. Oh, yes I did fix the hole.) Sure, leaders can have emotions. But if our emotions get out of control they get in our way. Our teams panic. Our customers walk. Our families cringe. I'm not advocating any kind of flat line robotics here. Enjoy your emotions. Cry. Laugh. Cuss if you need to. Enjoy the joy that's there in lif...

High Performance Leadership

Search This Blog