Skip to main content

Be Strong Without Being A Bully

There is a balance that leaders must find. Go too easy on your team and they will perceive that you don't care. You're not there to create a country club atmosphere. There are standards. There are goals. There are expectations. Your job is to communicate those goals and expectations and follow-up to make sure that your team is achieving them.

That does not mean shouting, demanding unreasonably, or bullying. You know who works for a bully? Only people who have no choice, and then they deliver the bare minimum. The popular image of a yelling, demanding boss only works in the movies. In real life, people find ways to leave the bully flat.

No one wants a weak supervisor. They want someone who has their back, who backs them up, who lets them know when they are delivering exemplary results and who also lets them know when they need to feedback. People want and need feedback. Just choose it carefully. Focus on the behavior, not the person.

No one wants a bully, either. Yell at me, shout at me, call me names, deride my character OR my intentions and I am out of here. No one wants or needs that.

Successful supervisors preserve respect and dignity even while requiring strong results. It's not either or. As is the case in so much of leadership, it is a question of balanced.

You do want to be known as someone who is balanced, don't you?

Find the balance.

-- Doug Smith


Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Now Means Now

How do you feel when someone says that they will do something right away, and then they don't? When I say "now!" I mean immediately, and without over-thinking. never under estimate the temptation  to overthink (I think I just did!) When is now? How about now? -- Doug smith  Looking for leadership training? That's what I do: doug smith training

Personally

Improving performance does require us to take our work seriously. But it does not require us to take ourselves too seriously. Taking things personally is a waste of self-esteem. -- doug smith  

Get Going!

What goal are you working on? Maybe you don't spend every minute of every day working on your goals. I certainly don't. But when I do work on my goals they propel me forward. They get me going. Find your favorite goal. Work on it.  Even if you start with the smallest task. Put one task after the other like little steps leading to a lofty elevation. Goals get us going. Because standing still goes nowhere. -- Doug Smith

Promise and then Deliver

Be careful what you promise to gain a new customer. They are only new for a day. After that, expectations continue even if you forget your promise.  Be careful what you promise. Do you have what you need to give your customers what they want? Because probably, what they want, is what you've promised. -- doug smith   

Start With Decisions

Do you share leadership? The most powerful teams share leadership responsibilities AND attitude. When you develop a team where people feel empowered to take charge, take responsibility, and take ownership you then no longer need to do all the difficult work. Delegation becomes easier. Collaboration feels more natural. Start with decisions. It's fast and easy as a leader to make all of the big decisions, but when you include your team in the conversations it takes to gain mutually shared understandings and collaborative decisions, you no longer have to "sell" your decisions --- people simply know what you as a team have decided and act accordingly. No passive aggressive resistance, no passengers on your team "bus" -- just fully engaged team members. Start with collaborative decisions. The rest will be much easier. -- Doug Smith

Solving Problems Requires The Courage to Tell The Truth

Can a problem be so tough that we deceive ourselves about solving it? In any problem there is a temptation to soften the edges, smooth the rough spots, to paint a better picture than we see. Sometimes we take sides and spin the truth in favor of our side, even when that contributes to a conflict or problem. We can do better than that. Solving problems together requires the courage to tell the truth as you see it. Not our version of the truth. Not our ideal of the truth. The truth as it exists, weak spots and all. If we want to clearly analyze a problem, we must be willing to see, and tell the truth. -- Douglas Brent Smith

Communicate!

A lack of communication is often interpreted as a lack of care. -- Doug Smith

Don't Jump!

I do it. You've probably done it, too. It gets us into trouble misinterpreting and reaching false conclusions. Slow down. Ease up from that jump. Stop that jump to conclusions and you'll avoid many big falls. -- doug smith  

Life Never Stops Teaching

Which learning curve are you climbing? The lessons keep coming. When we keep growing, our energy sparks with new creativity, new courage, new compassion, and new clarity. When we keep growing, life's adventure brings more smiles than troubles. High performance leaders make it a point to keep learning. That means taking on the tough assignments. That means listening to the needs of your team and building on their ideas. That means constantly debriefing, decoding, and deciding. There's a lesson in all of this somewhere. Centered leaders find the lesson and grow. Life never stops teaching. What have you learned today? -- Doug Smith

Focused Truth

Focused leaders have zero time for inauthentic messages. They tell the truth unconditionally and insist on the truth consistently. Be a leader who can handle the truth. Be a leader who tells the truth. -- doug smith