Love The Person and Fix the Problem

Photo by L. Scott Force

How are you at fixing people?

I've discovered that I'm not very good at fixing people. Whether or not they are broken, there's not much that I can do to fix people.

But problems are very different. Problems are caused by things that can be changed. Problems are caused by what we've done, are doing, or have created. As Dean Gano points out, problems tend to be caused by either conditions or actions. Discovering what those conditions and/or are and changing them is not only easier than changing people -- it's the better way to solve the problem.

People are in the mix. People do the actions that might be causing the problem, or create the conditions that may have created the problem. But changing people usually fails and frustrates everyone concerned. Changing actions or conditions is the way to go.

It takes patience. People might not want to change anything at all, and may need to be convinced. But they don't need to be changed -- we only need to change what they do.

As they resist (and they will) or persist (in undesired behaviors) we'll need to be patient. We'll need to focus on the things that can and should be changed. And, we'll need to remind our expectations that people seldom get it right the first time. That doesn't make them bad -- it makes them human.

Our job is simple: love the person and fix the problem.

Are you willing?

-- Douglas Brent Smith

Front range Leadership: High Performance Leadership Training

doug smith training: how to achieve your goals

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Get Going!

What goal are you working on? Maybe you don't spend every minute of every day working on your goals. I certainly don't. But when I do work on my goals they propel me forward. They get me going. Find your favorite goal. Work on it. Even if you start with the smallest task. Put one task after the other like little steps leading to a lofty elevation. Goals get us going. Because standing still goes nowhere. -- Doug Smith

Now Means Now

How do you feel when someone says that they will do something right away, and then they don't? When I say "now!" I mean immediately, and without over-thinking. never under estimate the temptation to overthink (I think I just did!) When is now? How about now? -- Doug smith Looking for leadership training? That's what I do: doug smith training

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Where do you start? When you're building a team. When you're starting a project. When your developing a career. When you bonding a relationship. Build a strong enough foundation and your subsequent mistakes won't matter. Take the time to create the agreements, the conditions, the promises that you keep. Take the time to steady the ship and the waves won't matter. Sure, problems will bother you. Certainly, mistakes will sometimes hurt. But that strong foundation that you build creates resiliency that will see you through. Why not build for the long, long term? -- Douglas Brent Smith

Promise and then Deliver

Be careful what you promise to gain a new customer. They are only new for a day. After that, expectations continue even if you forget your promise. Be careful what you promise. Do you have what you need to give your customers what they want? Because probably, what they want, is what you've promised. -- doug smith

More Than Convenience

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Communicate!

A lack of communication is often interpreted as a lack of care. -- Doug Smith

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Personally

Improving performance does require us to take our work seriously. But it does not require us to take ourselves too seriously. Taking things personally is a waste of self-esteem. -- doug smith

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Solving Problems Requires The Courage to Tell The Truth

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High Performance Leadership

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