Plan Important Conversations

How many conversations have you taken the time to plan today?

Leaders conduct highly important conversations. While we can sometimes do that on the fly, what about those conversations that require deeper thinking? What about those conversations when the people we want to be most communicative with resist our thinking or our message?

Those deeper conversations benefit from planning.

What do we plan? Here are some areas of planning that I've found useful:

The goal of the conversation - Is it just to touch base? Are you trying to influence the other person? Do you need to reach agreement on a next action? Be sure to set a goal (I'd recommend a goal with these three elements: an action word, the result that you want, and the time involved).
Transition time - It's often jarring to be thrust into a conversation unexpectedly. Create some transitional topic or ice-breaker to transition into your deeper conversation. Small talk works here, but make it more personal than the weather or the latest sports outcome.
Agreements - part of my CLUES to Success formula for building great conversations is creating agreements. These can be simple but don't skip them. What kind of agreements? For example, how long the conversation will last, where the conversation will take place, how you'd like to interact (my favorite is "respect each other") and what 's the goal.

Here's those CLUES to Success;

Create agreements

Listen with curiosity

Understand the facts and feelings

Express yourself clearly and positively

Share responsibility for success

Not only are these effective as part of your conversation, but you could make them your agreements during the conversation. Even if it feels awkward at first, the more people are exposed to and practice these CLUES to Success the more likely they are to utilize them productively. And, when they are used productivity there's no limit to what you can accomplish in a shared dialogue.

Do you plan your conversations? Should you plan your next important, deeper conversation?

--- Doug Smith

Comments

Busy

What to do? High performance leaders prioritize based on mission, vision, values, and goals -- of course! And also, we prioritize based on what will just plain do some good. What's the point in leading unless it is to make a better world? There are enough needs in the world to keep everyone busy improving things. Keep going! -- doug smith

Money Isn't Everything

The profit motive is a poor substitute for genuine value. Money isn't everything. It's not even the most important thing. Oh, sure it's incredibly important. As a person who has many times wondered if there would be enough cash to pay the bills, I have come to respect mightily the value of money. But money is transactional. People are more than transactions. What we value most is more than money can buy, is more than a transaction, is a character of depth and peacefulness, and yes, love that is earned, not bought. Think about that for a minute. -- doug smith

Your Reputation

More authority means higher levels of responsibility. More power requires more service to others, not less. What you do with your power is who you will be known as. Also, how you use the power you have creates who people will remember you as. How do you want to be remembered? -- doug smith

Show Integrity

The goals we seek bring a lot of pull to them. We get wrapped in them. It's useful and it's powerful when we care about our goals so much that they propel us forward and keep us working even when we're tired, beyond the boundaries of our usual limitations. But they should not take us beyond the boundaries of our usual values. They should not trick us into bending the rules just because the rules are in the way. Truly high performance leaders of character who are focused, and centered, and noble maintain integrity. No cheating is ever worth the outcome. Integrity is so rare that many people don't even recognize. If you do, be thankful. We need leaders like you. To truly understand integrity you've got to keep it. Even when it's hard. Even the lines are blurred. -- doug smith

Search and Improve

Sometimes we do things a certain way because we've always done things a certain way. It's easy, it's comfortable, it's probably inadequate and it can certainly be improved. Finding the right process powers your productivity. Better performance starts with better processes. For the next twenty-four hours, pay attention to each process you engage with, and ponder how you might make that process better or, find another better one altogether. -- doug smith

Personally

Improving performance does require us to take our work seriously. But it does not require us to take ourselves too seriously. Taking things personally is a waste of self-esteem. -- doug smith

Measures Matter

Some people measure quantify first and quality later. Some people measure money first and impact to the team later (not even second!). How you measure productivity might determine your character and your reputation. Put people first. -- doug smith

Start With Kindness

When you start with kindness you don't have to stay there, but you probably will. It works better for others. It works better for you. If you're human, you'll probably relapse. It does take practice to stay the course. The course starts by starting. When you start with kindness, it becomes more naturally the way. High performance leadership develops from the core leadership strengths of clarity, creativity, courage, and compassion. Build one of those strengths today thru some act of kindness and the others will get stronger as well. -- doug smith

Growing

Mountains never stop growing; why should we? It came as a surprise to me to learn that the Rocky Mountains are still growing. Trimmed a bit by years of erosion, they are still poking their way skyward and changing in the direction of growth. As leaders we find ourselves faced with the dynamic between growth and erosion, life and decay. Standing still leads to the less desirable choice. Growth requires our attention, our efforts, our drive. Growth requires the courage to step forward, the creativity to find new ways of dealing with challenges, the clarity of purpose to know which direction you are growing in and the compassion to forgive those who slow you down. What are you doing to spark your leadership growth today? -- Douglas Brent Smith

Service Problems

The problem with bad service is that it creates bad customers. Solve your service problem or the problem customers will multiply. -- doug smith

High Performance Leadership

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