We are all good at judging. We ascribe motives to other people all the time. We judge their driving, their performance, their communication...judging is natural. But how useful is it?
Do you like to be judged? Do you want other people judging your motives, your desire, your intention? Probably not -- and neither do other people want that from you.
We do have other choices. My favorite is to stay curious. Whenever I catch myself about to judge (maybe 99 times a day!) I've learned to pause, breathe, and stay curious. What's really going on? How much of whatever I'm about to judge has anything to do with me? And if it is all about me, how much have I contributed to what I am about to judge? If I've contributed a lot, then maybe judgment isn't what I'm looking for because that means judging myself as well. And, if I haven't contributed a lot, maybe it is time that I did...BEFORE I feel empowered to judge.
Before you judge, see what other choices you have. I guarantee you there is a better choice available.
-- doug smith
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